My Dearest Nikki…

Image result for nikki giovanni and james baldwin


The other day I saw an interesting video between Nikki Giovanni and James Baldwin from some decades back. The conversation hinged on the idea of the black man hiding his true feelings and emotions to the public to keep his job or not to piss off the powers that be. However, returns home, and due to his lies and deceit of doing this, shows his woman and their family anger and frustration. Nikki suggestion is for him to lie to her just as he does throughout the day. Interesting. I thought I’d tangle with this concept with the utmost respect in the form of poetry. This piece is called: My Dearest Nikki. I hope you enjoy. #spokenwords #positvepoetry #scotthall

James (Maybe):

So in the blink of an eye you want me to tell you a lie; but I can’t and I’ll attempt to give your several reasons why/

See, I wake every morning and have to grab my mask off the table to begin my day of living a fable/

I run past you and the kids, kisses blown in the air, pretend I’m not hungry because I know ain’t much to spare/

The cab driver sees me standing in the same spot daily, but he picks up the Latino dude I guess his hair is more wavy/

Now by the time I punch the clock, I’m like 15 minutes late, the manager he is pissed, but he doesn’t say nothing but I see the look on his face/

So instead he doubles up my production quota and cuts my lunch time in half and tell me if I don’t like it then I can kiss his “black ass”/

What’s funny is that I put him on to the job, put a good word in for him, but now he trying to play god/

But I just smile and keep it moving, tell him that I understand, and everything will be fine as long as I get that check in my hand/

Speaking of check, you have no idea what I have to go through, when I walk in the bank the security guard breaks his neck/

Just cause he remember me from the pin, while he was working correction, now his hands on his pistol I guess for his and their protection/

But I nod my head and proceed to cash my paycheck, knowing the tellers gonna do the most and I can’t get too crazy with the nervous guard walking his post/

20 minutes later, after they verified everything, but I know I missed the train because it leaves at 5:15/

Which means, by the time I get home you already gonna be mad, and I know I can’t blame it on the day that I had/

Because I know you been here with the set of twins we been blessed with, and to complain about my day would almost be a death wish/

Her (Nikki maybe): yes lie and tell me that everything is not fine, and that you cursed out the taxi driver for making you late for work this time/

Lie and tell me that you mean mugged the security guard and that you questioned the bank tellers on how they still have a job/

At least then, I know that’ it’s just a lie, because that’s just not who you are but at least I’ll understand why/

It’s just the anger and frustration that shows on your face its beginning to a toll on our family each and every day/

James (Maybe):

I’m so sorry my Dearest Nikki, I get it I see, because that frustration and anger was gonna be the death of us and me.